Joke: What do you get when you put 2 blondies in a blender
Answer: A Banana Split.
Submited By: Jigsaw
2007-07-21 05:30:42
Joke: A smart blonde, santa, and the easter bunny jump off a cliff. who lands first?
Answer: none of them. none of them exist!
Submited By: leehall
2007-01-15 08:52:21
Joke: A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started." Her boyfriend asks,
"What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The bonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger." Her boyfriend decides to go over and help lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble
these pieces into anything resembling a tiger." He takes her hand and says,"Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice
cup of tea, and then ..." He sighed....."Let's put all the Frosted Flakes back in the
box......."
Submited By: Anonymous
2004-03-15 12:57:57
Joke: a blonde was riding in her car 1 day 2 go 2 disneyland....
she saw a sign that said disney land..left...
so she went back home....
Submited By: Anonymous
2004-03-15 12:55:46
Joke: A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are in a breast stroke race. The starter's gun goes off and the three girls dive into the pool. The brunette and the redhead shoot across the pool and get out; 20 minutes later the blonde reaches the end and gets out. The judge says, "The gold medal goes to the brunette, the silver medal goes to the redhead, and the bronze goes to the blonde". The blonde says,
Answer: "I don't want to be a sore loser, but I think the other girls were using their arms."
Submited By: Anonymous
2004-03-15 01:15:56
Joke: A brunette goes to the doctor and as she points with her finger she says, "Doctor it hurts everywhere. Ponting to her leg hurts, my arm hurts, my neck hurts, and even my head hurts!" The doctor asks, "Were you ever a Blonde?"
"Yes, I was." she replies. "Why do you ask?"
The doctor answers, "because your finger is broken!"
Submited By: Anonymous
2004-03-15 01:13:21
Joke: A blonde walks into a hair dresser with a walkman on. She tells the guy to cut whatever he wants just as long as he cuts around the headphones. So the guy says cool until he runs into a problem, he says "Ms.?" "Ms.?" Finally he just takes them off and the blonde drops dead!!
He puts the headphones on and he hears "BREATHE IN.....BREATHE OUT.....BREATHE IN.....BREATHE OUT."
Submited By: Anonymous
2004-03-15 01:06:50
Joke: One sunny day while on patrol, a police officer pulled over a red Mitsubishi 3000GT for speeding. He walked up to the car and asked the driver to roll down her window. Immediately, he was stunned by just how beautiful she was! Probably the most beautiful blonde he'd ever laid eyes on. I've pulled you over for speeding, Ma'am.... could I see your drivers license
and registration please." "...What's a license...???" replied the blonde. Big blue eyes sweetly looking up at him. "Your drivers license is generally in a wallet", replied the officer. After fumbling for a few minutes, the driver managed to find it. "Now may I see your registration?.." asked the cop. "Registration?..... What's that....?" asked the blonde. "It's usually in your glove compartment..." said the cop patiently. After some more fumbling, she found the registration. "Thank you Ma'am. I'll be back in a minute..." said the cop and walked back to his patrol car. The officer phoned into the dispatch to run a check on the woman's license and registration. After a few moments, the dispatcher came back; "Ummm....is this woman driving a red sports car?" "Yes...." replied the officer. "Is she a drop dead gorgeous blonde?" asked the dispatcher. "Uh... yes" replied the cop. "Here's what you do...." said the dispatcher. "Give her the stuff back, and drop your pants..." "WHAT!!? I can't do that. Its..... inappropriate..." exclaimed the cop. "Trust me..... just do it...." said the dispatcher. So the cop goes back to the car, gives back the license and registration and drops his pants, just as the dispatcher said. The blonde looks down and sighs..."Ohh no... not ANOTHER breathalyzer..."
Submited By: Anonymous
2004-03-15 01:02:38
Joke: Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert an hour east of Bakersfield, CA, a blonde, new to boating was having a problem. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't get her brand new 22 ft Bayliner to perform. It wouldn't get on a plane at all, and it was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power she applied.
After about an hour of trying to make it go, she putted over to a nearby marina. Maybe they could tell her what was wrong.
A thorough topside check revealed everything was in perfect working order. The engine ran fine, the outdrive went up and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath the boat. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.
Submited By: Anonymous
2004-03-15 01:01:58
Joke: There are three blondes stranded on an island. Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them one wish.
The first blonde asks to be intelligent. Instantly, she is turned into a brown haired woman and she swims off the island.
The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, so instantly she is turned into a black haired woman.The black haired woman builds a boat and sails off the island.
The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The fairy turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.
